It’s December 31st at 11:59 PM and you’re at a crowded party. Everyone around you is scrambling to grab a glass of champagne. Someone yells “TEN” then “NINE” and before you know it everyone is screaming “Happy New Year!” and kissing each other. But not you, you don’t rejoice and say “Happy New Year” instead you smile, clink your glass with your friends and declare, “New year, new me.”
That’s right 2018 is all about your personal glow up. Now if you’re looking for New Year’s resolutions to keep this isn’t for you. This is a list of things that if consistently done throughout the year will guarantee an inevitable glow up. When you look back at photos from 2017 you’ll be like, “Who is that person? Do I know her?”
Let’s really take the phrase new year, new me to heart this year. Happy glowing up!
Give your social media a break in the month beforehand
Some call this a healthy break from an otherwise immense waste of time and energy, but some call it Taylor Swifting.
Taking a break on social media is harder than you think but also super underrated. It's the same as going through a break up — people think it's best to put a ton of photos up showing how well they're doing, but it just seems overwhelming and desperate.
Going ghost for a month or so and reappearing looking Happy, Healthy and Hot will have way more of an impact than showing the whole transition.
Hide under your layers while you still can
You have a month and a half to kick your diet and workout regiment into gear, and while that probably sounds short to some, a lot can change in six weeks. I know because it's the longest I've ever worked out consecutively.
For now, even while you're working out, dress in a way that's comfortable and concealing so when you do finally reveal the ~slight~ change in the new year, it seems dramatic af.
Take care of your skin and try going out less
Saying no to going out in the winter is a lot easier than saying no to going out in the summer, so take advantage of it. It's not weird on a Friday to say you want to go home and relax and nobody will really judge you for it.
Spend less time drinking wine and a bit more time drinking water. Buy a ton of those 5 for $25 face masks at Urban and try moisturizing your skin for a month and wearing less makeup — or at least moisturizing under the makeup.
That way, come January, your skin will be primed and ready for a whole lot of highlighter.
You can keep the cigarettes — for now.
Ignore any potential fuckboys for the next few weeks
Do not let anybody trip you up on this mission because the only way a glow up works is if you really focus on it. Kind of like how Taylor Swift is dating Joe Alwyn — there's no way he's distracting enough to get her off track.
I'm not even sure he talks — he's just a useful sounding board. Get yourself a sounding board, not a distraction.
And don't worry about what happens after. Anyone who dated you before your glow up doesn't get to say they dated you after, because technically that was in another life.
A glow up can be temporary, but it can also be life changing — either way something has shifted and you're no longer the person you were two months ago.
This is the best time to educate yourself, work hard, make money and get closer to your friends because a new year means a fresh slate, and you're not bringing any of 2017 with you.
Related stories recommended by this writer:
● Queer girls are tweeting their 'coming-out glo-ups' and homophobes are shaking
● These celebrity glo-ups prove that no one's actually ugly, just broke
● I put my real weight in my Tinder bio to see how guys would react
1. Drink more water
This is WAY easier said than done, so don’t worry I’m not going to leave you hanging with this half-ass advice like some low-rung Instagram model who doesn’t want to give up her skin routine.
The simplest and cheapest way to keep drinking water throughout the day is to buy a reusable water bottle. I would recommend a S’well or Hydroflask because they’re sleek and keep your water chilled. You can also download the free app Plant Nanny, you record your water intake, which then waters your cute electronic plants. I used it for a year and trust me it works. If you hate the taste of water, buy an infuser water bottle so you can bring your cucumber and strawberry water on the go.
2. Have your best skin yet
This is the year of clear skin. To help kick your skin routine back into gear the Feel Beauty Super Soft Kit is where it’s at. The three products included, Moisture Balancing Cream, Anywhere Balm and Pumpkin Walnut Facial Cleanser are perfect for pressing the reset button on your skin. The pumpkin cleanser will gently slough off dry skin and is packed with Vitamins A and C. Followed with the balancing cream, which contains plant extract and oils, your skin will be fresh and hydrated.
6. Make your pearly whites whiter
Having pearly white teeth is a must for the new year. I recommend Oral Essentials because they use natural ingredients, so these whitening strips won’t cause sensitivity or hurt your enamel in the long run like other brands. They’re seriously magic because they will whiten your teeth in 30 minutes. If they don’t sound perfect enough, you can buy them on Amazon. Done and done.